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This blog looks at how families express themselves and provides practical suggestions for improving communication.  Of course, "effective" and "improving" are value-laden terms, so while you may not agree with each of my suggestions, I do hope you'll keep stopping by to find the nuggets that work for you and those you love.  As you find ideas of value, please share this page with others.

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Thursday, February 2, 2012

Top Five Regrets of the Dying – What are your priorities?

I’m sitting here listening to the new compilation of Dylan covers: Chimes of Freedom (click on the title for a link to the album).  Specifically to Jeff Beck’s version of “Like a Rolling Stone” – “How does it feel to be on your own, with no direction home, like a complete unknown, like a rolling stone?”  So I’m feeling a bit reflective.

Five Regrets of the DyingOne of my clients just sent me the link to an article written by Bronnie Ware (click on the preceding highlight for a link to the article).  Bronnie worked for years with those nearing death and she cataloged their top five regrets.

  1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
  2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
  3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
  4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
  5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

I don’t necessarily agree with each of her interpretations or applications related to these five regrets, but I find the regrets interesting.  To me they seem to circle around the term “priorities.”

We must make choices about what we want out of this life and what we are willing to do to achieve those priorities.

Probably the most powerful part of her article for me was the following: “It is very important to try and honor at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.”  I’ve seen people who are disabled or in poor health live meaningful lives, but she is correct that there is a freedom that health provides – one we often take for granted.

So what will you do today, this month, this year to minimize your regrets?

How will you teach your children to live a life of minimal regrets?

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