Other adults are influencing our children

That heading is self-evident.  We’ve known this since the time our children headed off to school.  It’s been true of the activities they’ve joined, the camps they’ve attended, and the innumerable other venues in which we’ve placed them.

Still, it can’t be ignored when your teenage son suddenly exhibit behaviors you weren’t expecting, only to find out that they are due, in large measure, to the influence of another adult in his life.

This summer our oldest began attending a Bible study with other young men.  The group is led by a 20-something engineering student working on his master’s.

We began to take notice when our son emptied the dishwasher unprompted, decided to get up early to study and read, memorized scripture, and was motivated to be productive in ways not typical for him.

For me, this was a great precursor to next year – his freshman year of college.  It reminded me that we are entering a phase of life where other adults will have significant impact on our children’s lives – at times it will feel as though the voices of those others are more influential than ours.

New voices attract attention.  New voices often articulate the same message you’ve been speaking, but using different words and images.  New voices are interesting – in part, because they are new.

As our children become independent adults, we must be cautious to not quit speaking into their lives, while being prepared that they may hear other speakers more readily for a time.  What we have in our favor is the bond of family, the power of repetition, and the home court advantage.  We’ve just got to be judicious in exercising that advantage and recalibrate our expectations to be realistic.

This time around I’m thankful for the outside voice and am praying for many more like it.

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